38 Weeks Pregnant - Locked and Loaded!

My wife is now at 38 weeks pregnant. (Full Term) My baby girl is ready to be born now! She's now 6.8 pounds and is 19-1/2 inches long from her head to heels, as long as a leek! She has a firm grasp now, which we'll soon be able to feel when our baby squeezes our finger for the first time :) :) :) Her organs are now fully developed and ready for life outside the womb.

This week, my wife's chiropractor said she's "Locked and Loaded" in the head down position in the pelvis, ready to be born! The midwife also said she has no dilation yet. However, the mild braxton hicks contractions have been increasing with as many as a couple per hour but are still without any pain and come and go. Some women report having these weeks before birth but we'll monitor it for any changes.

This week we've been wondering when early labor will start. We are lucky to have many helpful resources from the midwife and our lamaze classes. According to Budapest Doula here are some common signs of early labor that we've been looking for:

-Intense Nesting: feverishly organizing baby's clothes by color or type, doing laundry, setting up the baby's room in great detail, and in general having an intense desire to prepare your house for your bundle of joy.
-Diarrhea: while it may be gross to talk about, this can be an important sign of early labor. All the mild contractions can soften the stool. Also, some say eating spicy foods can cause more bowel movements which can in turn initiate more contractions. But we all know about old wives tales.
-Increasing Contractions: this is textbook right, increasing in frequency and intensity. Right now we've only had the mild braxton hicks version to the best of our knowledge, but she has noticed the frequency and intensity increasing slightly in the past couple days.
-Dilated Cervix: this hasn't happened yet. We have another appointment this Thursday though and who knows maybe we'll see some dilation. If not, the midwife said she might starting stripping the membranes to help it along. Stripping the membranes can help labor along because it assists in ripening the cervix and preparing it to dilate.
-Losing the Mucus Plug: aka "Bloody Show" is a jelly like substance that can be clear, pink, grey or another color that can range from very small to the size of a golf ball and is the substance that seals the cervix and prevents harmful bacteria from entering the cervix during the 9 months of pregnancy. My wife has not lost this yet, however some women never notice it, some lose it multiple times, it really depends.
-Breaking the Water: ah, yes, the common sign of pregnancy we all recognize from the movies. However, real life is usually much less dramatic. It might start leaking, might gush out, however most women don't actually have it break until active labor. Again, no waters have broke yet. One thing I didn't know with this is once you spring a leak of amniotic fluid, you should not take baths or have sex, because you could introduce harmful bacteria to the open uterus!

We've had some braxton hicks contractions, but mostly we've just been nesting a lot! We even finished the nursery, here's a 360 degree view of our purple and white baby's room. I think it's a beautiful room for our beautiful girl:


Baby Nursery Finished - 360 degree view

So, we're playing the waiting game now. In the meantime I have been stressing a lot about the pending birth. I too am nesting in a way and am afraid we don't have everything ready. It helps to talk about it though.

I mentioned to my brother the other day that you'll never be ready for all of this. No matter how much you want to have children, no matter how many books you ready or websites you research, nothing will fully prepare you for everything you will go through. Your life will go though a major change, but it's a good change and it's one that will help you grow. Becoming a father doesn't happen overnight and it's a process.

Sympathy Weight Update: lost a couple, at 204 lbs, my sympathy weight gained stands at 19 lbs so far. I just took a 10 mile bike ride yesterday so that might help, I'm so sore though, ah!

Well that's all for now, thank you for reading my blog! It means so much to me that people see my experience and hopefully get something out of it. Next week my baby will weigh as much as a Baby Watermelon, believe it or not!

See How My Baby's Growing at 38 Weeks

See What's Happening Inside the Fetus this Week

See how big my baby is getting week by week, now she is as long as a Leekd! Ouch!!!

36 Weeks Pregnant - The Final, Final Stretch!

My wife is now at 36 weeks pregnant. My baby girl is now 6 pounds and is 18-1/2 inches long from her head to heels, weighs as much as a Crenshaw Melon! She's now losing her covering of thin peach fuzz hair and the waxy material that covered her skin called the vernix caseosa. Ever gotten out of a hot bath after sitting for awhile and got wrinkly skin? Well, this covering helps the baby stay wrinkle free in the amniotic fluid for 9 months.

This week, my wife's prenatal exams have increased in frequency to weekly. Our midwife started checking the cervix and there is no dilation yet. She'll check every week and it can help them gauge how far off the start of labor is.

This week my wife and I have finally felt like we can see the light at the end of the long and arduous tunnel of pregnancy. I think it's a relief mentally for her to be at this point now, but there's still the anxiety of the actual pending birth which although we've prepared for, we are still uncertain and nervous.

The biggest thing weighing on our mind, which is probably the same for most people, is the pain at birth. We are hoping to have a water birth, however there are many factors that can prevent this. (ie. too much blood loss, unsafe increase in fetal heart rate, no pain meds allowed in the water, and being able to physically get in and out of the water without assistance)

We are learning to take comfort in the little things we can control: our diets (we're both trying to eat more fruits and veggies), our mental health (taking time to relax and de-stress), feeling and hearing the baby's heartrate (my mom is a nurse and gave us one of her stethoscopes), and just knowing that the end is near.

I'm not ashamed to admit, as a new dad to be I'm stressed about it and kind of scared terrified at times. I mean, I think no matter how much you prepare, the thought of having a little life before you that you're absolutely 100% responsible for their well-being 24/7/365 is enough to put stone cold fear into any man before he learns how to do it. I've wondered if I was ready, and even had days where I questioned myself, but I know I have what it takes. I need to remember to breathe, and know that I was born to do this, I am equipped with all the necessary skills, and wherever I lack knowledge I will quickly learn and re-learn as I go.


Sympathy Weight Update: UNCHANGED, at 206 lbs, my sympathy weight gained stands at 21 lbs so far.

Well that's all for now, next week my baby will be as long as a swiss chard... what the heck is a swiss chard - see it here???

See How My Baby's Growing at 36 Weeks

See What's Happening Inside the Fetus this Week

See how big my baby is getting week by week, now she weighs as much as a Crenshaw Melon! Ouch!!!

I Can Hear the Baby Moving!

So my baby girl is moving more and more now inside my wife's belly, and it's really exciting. While I was feeling the movements the other night, I started thinking I wonder if I would be able to hear the baby moving if I placed my ear to her belly. Sure enough, I could! It sounds like an echo chamber probably because all the fluid and but you can distinctly hear the thumps of the baby's limbs abruptly pushing against the walls of the uterus! It sounds really cool to hear my baby for the first time. My wife felt a little left out when this happened though. She wanted to be able to hear her too. I haven't told her yet but I'm going to get a stethoscope soon so she can hear the movements also. I'm also starting to visualize her more and more. I can almost see her growing if I imagine as I look at my wife's belly. I think the seeds of fatherhood have now been planted as I'm thinking more and more about it and think I'm starting the bonding process. In an email the other day my wife even signed it her name and baby. That made me happy, I look forward to being a father so much. Until next week, thanks for reading!

Transition to a Father's Mind

My mind is rapidly changing now, evolving into a father's mind. I don't believe one can easily define what it means to be a father. It is complex and the change takes place over many years and with many stages. I'm just entering the first stage which is first acceptance, and coming to terms with my pending fatherhood. Right now I'm learning. I'm learning it's not about me anymore. My needs are quickly becoming secondary. I'm starting to imagine what my baby's face will look like. I haven't had any dreams yet but I think I will soon. It makes me deeply content to know I will be a father soon. To me there is no bigger aspiration as an adult male and to strive to be a good father is a privileged I am happy to enjoy.

18 Weeks Pregnant - Heard the Heartbeat Again, 1-1/2 Weeks Until the Sex Determining Ultrasound!!!

My wife is now at 18 weeks. That's right, I skipped week 17, got a bit behind on the posting. However, I will catch up in this post. My baby is now about 5-1/2 inches from crown to rump, about the size of a bell pepper. He or She (yet to be determined) is now about 7 ounces in weight and is flexing his or her arms and legs. My wife is feeling the baby A LOT! She will tell me each time she feels it by saying "Baby" in an excited voice and clutching the bottom of her belly. I can't feel it yet, but I hope soon.

So far we've had 2 prenatal exams and an ultrasound at 8 weeks, and we just had another regular exam this week where our midwife measured the uterus to be about exactly 5-1/2 inches in length and we could hear the baby's heartbeat again! It was strong and normal. It was a perfectly normal 145 beats per minute and sounded wonderful. Our midwife is really nice also. She said there are many options for delivery such as a water birth, hypno-birth (which apparently is just like it sounds), and the standard epidural traditional lie on your back ordeal. So far my wife feels like the water birth may be the best option. I can get in the water with her and hold her while she goes through it. Also, they say it helps with contractions and can minimize tearing, but we'll see when that time comes. You cannot have pain medication with a water birth, but they said if the pain is too great when you're in the thick of things you can always change your mind and you're in a hospital so there are many other options. I think the thing I like best about a midwife is that they are really dedicated to a birth plan and really want my wife to make the best decisions for her and our baby. She is very supportive!

Now for the most exciting news. We have the Sex Determining Ultrasound in only 1-1/2 weeks!!! It's a little bit before the standard 20 week waiting period, but they said the technology is there to find out sooner. I can't wait to find out and be able to refer to my baby as he, or she, instead of "It." In case you're interested. I do not have a preference of a boy or a girl. Contrary to popular belief, not all men are so caught up in their own legacy to have to have a boy. I would be perfectly fine with a girl I just want my baby to be healthy and happy.

Sympathy Weight Update: Current Weight is 201. As it turns out I had some scale difficulties last week and it was totally inaccurate and had my at 192 by mistake. Total sympathy weight gained to date - 16 pounds! I would like to stay at 200 pounds or less, I've never weighed this much! I know, some of you that are older are probably laughing. "You ain't seen nothing yet, boy"

Well that's all for now, next week my baby will be the size of a large heirloom Tomato!

See What's Happening Inside the Fetus this Week

See how big my baby is getting week by week, now it's a Bell Pepper

17, 18, weeks, move, feel, sex, determining, ultrasound, kicking, 2nd trimester, baby, c-section, home birth, Father, Man perspective, Men pregnancy, morning sickness, pregnancy, sympathy weight

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16 Weeks Pregnant - My Baby Has Toenails, Sympathy Weight Update

My wife is now at 16 weeks. This week we are now in the rapid growth phase. The baby has now grown to about 4-1/2 inches long and about 3-1/2 ounces in weight, the size of an avocado from head to bottom! The uterus is now growing and stretching with the ligaments holding it in place are strengthening and growing. My baby's scalp pattern is starting to form which will eventually create the hair growth. She is feeling the baby more now which is very early. She gets happy and tells me when she does. I can't feel it yet but I get happy too just knowing that my baby is doing well and moving up a storm!

Her morning sickness is mostly gone but she still takes a combination of half of a 25mg of Unisom sleeping pill with a vitamin B6. There's no telling when she will be able to stop taking this, but we hope soon. She is also getting very tired and is starting to become more limited in her physical ability. We were raking leaves the other day and I needed to do most of the work because she cannot exert or bend over too much. I love her and am happy to do most of the work though, I gave her the leaf blower and that worked out great!

I think this week we were less stressed. We watched a great movie about pregnancy that you should give a look if you're expecting. It's on Netflix streaming and is called "The Business of Being Born" and stars Ricki Lake. It's a controversial documentary that looks at the business of the hospital system and the potential harmful side effects of things like drugs and Cesarean sections (C-sections) and strongly advocates natural and home birth. It was very interesting and made us think about how she'd like to give birth when that day comes. She doesn't think she would want a home birth, but it's something to think about. We have been bonding more over the little things and are growing closer as mother and father to be.

Sympathy Weight Update: Current Weight is 192. Actually lost a few pounds. Total sympathy weight gained to date - 12 pounds.

Well that's all for now, next week my baby will be the size of an Turnip!

See What's Happening Inside the Fetus this Week

See how big my baby is getting week by week, now it's an Avocado

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16 weeks, 2nd trimester, baby, c-section, home birth, Father, Man perspective, Men pregnancy, morning sickness, pregnancy, sympathy weight

15 Weeks Pregnant - My Baby Can Sense Light!

My wife is now at 15 weeks. The baby has now grown to about 4 inches long, the size of an apple from head to bottom! They say the baby can now sense light, and you can shine a flashlight close to her belly towards where the uterus is and you may be able to sense the baby moving away from the beam. Well we tried it, didn't work, and then we stopped due to an irrational fear of harming our baby with a flashlight. Needless to say we are worried about the health of the baby these days and are watching everything very closely. My wife has also been starting to feel the baby this soon! At first she said it felt like a marble rolling around inside her, but yesterday she said while at work it felt like a little fist punching her insides! That made me laugh.

Her nausea is decreasing but she still takes a combination of half of a 25mg of Unisom sleeping pill with a vitamin B6. The doctor says it can help with the nausea and she thinks it seems to be working. Her belly keeps getting bigger and bigger which is surprising how fast she is showing. She is not a vain person but jokingly says she's getting fat. I keep telling her she's not fat, she's pregnant, there's a difference. Besides, she looks even more beautiful with new curves and a beautiful belly that she didn't have before. I love her more ever day, but with the love also comes stress.

These days I'm more stressed out than ever. It's because of uncertainty. I'm uncertain about my growing baby and knowing it's not yet "viable" yet like websites say, that is able to survive if something went wrong (I think it becomes viable in a month or so). I'm also uncertain about pending fatherhood. I know I have it within me to be a great father but I know I have so much to learn it's overwhelming. Lastly, money is also a source of stress as we are still unsure how much time both of us can get off work and how to pay for any uncompensated time off. But I have to remember to breathe. One step at a time. I do have faith that everything will work out for the best. I know if times get tough, we will get tougher, that's just the kind of people that we are.

Well that's all for now, next week my baby will be the size of an Avocado! Oh no, suddenly I just got a craving for guacamole, just what I need, more cravings! Speaking of cravings I think my sympathy weight has leveled off at around 14 pounds so far, but I'll weigh myself and give an update next week just to be sure.

See What's Happening Inside the Fetus this Week

See how big my baby is getting week by week, now it's an Apple!

15 weeks, 2nd trimester, baby, Father, Man perspective, Men pregnancy, morning sickness, pregnancy, sympathy weight

14 Weeks Pregnant: Morning Sickness is Diminishing, Total Sympathy Weight gained so far = 14 pounds! (1 pound per week)

The morning sickness is diminishing quickly. My wife still gets nauseous occasionally, but at least it's not every morning anymore. For about a month straight or more I would wake up to the sound of her vomiting in our bathroom. It made me sad because I couldn't fully relate. She needed cereal before she got out of bed every morning because the emptier her stomach was, the more she felt sick and this is still true today.

Now we're entering the 2nd trimester at 14 weeks and it seems to be getting better. Our sex life still isn't what it used to be but I'm not worried about it. I know that she doesn't want me when she feels like she might get sick on me and of course that doesn't sound too appealing to me either. I'm nothing if not understanding and am trying not to complain when she needs me. This is good practice for when the baby comes and my time is demanded significantly more.

I weighed myself at the clinic when we went to hear the heartbeat last week, and my current weight is 202 pounds up from 188 pounds when she got pregnant. That's 1 pound a week, WOW, I couldn't believe it! Now that's what they call sympathy weight. I have noticed I have been finding comfort in food more now that she's eating more and it makes her feel better. Perhaps it's psychological... either way I think I'll need to watch what I eat and exercise a bit more to regulate it more.

13 Weeks Pregnant: Heard the Heartbeat

My baby sounded like a kettle drum in an echo chamber! It was beautiful how my baby girl, or boy sounded. (we find that out at 20 weeks) Next week my baby will be the size of a lemon! (about 3-1/2 inches from head to bottom) if you want to see a slideshow to get an idea of the size of your baby week by week from a poppy seed to a pumpkin go here.

Welcome to my Man's Pregnancy Sympathy Blog!

Welcome to baby in my baby! This is a blog telling the story of pregnancy and all the physical, mental, and emotional side effects from an emotionally in tune man's point of view. My name is Justin. I'm 30, married and my wife is now 13 Weeks pregnant with our first baby. The baby is the size of a medium sized shrimp. (there's a website that compares the baby size by week to things found in a kitchen, but I'll go into that more later)

So far I've learned it's hard to know what to do, think or feel half the time, but it's getting easier. She is starting to overcome the morning sickness (no more getting bowls of cereal in bed every morning) and is starting to show more and more all the time.

I'll talk about everything, I want this to be a learning experience for me and other guys out there. We have unique needs that sometimes go neglected (and I'm not just talking about sex by the way).

Either way I'm glad you're here and I hope this can be a learning experience. I'll post more soon.